What is IFS Therapy?
Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is all about connecting with parts of you that are overworked, hidden away, or in conflict with each other to allow your most authentic Self and values to be at the center of how you live your life.
IFS therapy is…
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IFS therapy goes beyond intellectual understanding and analysis of your experiences. It helps you to experience real changes somatically (in your body) and in your daily life. IFS therapy accounts for how our bodies respond to different emotions and experiences. We learn to do this together in session and we go at your own pace.
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IFS theory is rooted in a deep and intentional understanding of how trauma impacts the whole person and their relationships. Consent is key in IFS therapy so that we do not recreate traumatic dynamics and situations. Your experience is centered and a priority.
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IFS therapy is informed by both modern and indigenous ideas of healing. If there are cultural or spiritual practices that you find essential to your mental health, I welcome the creative ways we can integrate them into our time together. I value learning about your cultural and family context to understand how patterns emerge and then collaborating with you to move toward more healthy relationships with yourself and others.
IFS therapy acknowledges the many ways our culture at large impacts an individual. Many of our “problems” are the result of systemic inequities, -isms, and institutions that cannot be solved by one person in therapy. My hope is that therapy empowers you to be in relationship with your surrounding cultures in ways that feel aligned with your values.
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IFS therapy believes that our responses and reactions are created out of necessity and protection. This doesn’t mean that all behaviors are without impact or accountability, but that we trust there is a positive intention from every part of us. Our hope is to understand and heal parts that are acting out of alignment with our values instead of trying to ignore, blame, or get rid of them.
While I use IFS therapy to address many different experiences, I am most passionate about using it to support clients who want to heal from relational trauma, intense anxiety, perfectionism & people-pleasing.
Relational trauma may look & sound like...
✤ Growing up with emotionally unavailable or emotionally dysregulated parents
✤ “I can’t share how I feel with others because then I’ll become a burden to them”
✤ Difficulty identifying and regulating emotions because you were never taught how to do it or were punished when you expressed emotions
✤ “I’m afraid to be myself around others”
People-pleasing may look & sound like...
✤ Feeling responsible for everyone else's emotions and experiences
✤ “It doesn’t matter what I want, as long as everyone else is happy”
✤ Intense fear of judgement, rejection, and upsetting others
✤ “Even though I don’t have time for myself, I can’t say no when someone asks for something”
Intense anxiety may look & sound like...
✤ Your body feeling like it's in constant hyper-vigilance mode
✤ “It’s so difficult to sleep or relax because my head is filled with constant ‘What if…’ questions”
✤ Experiences of panic and anxiety attacks
✤ Dissociation (numbing out, excessive scrolling or screen time, etc.) to avoid anxious feelings
✤ “I want to enjoy my life but I can’t stop feeling like something bad is going to happen”
Perfectionism may look & sound like...
✤ Experiencing loud inner critics
✤ “Failure is not an option!”
✤ Deep fears of failure, disappointing others, and not being good enough
✤ “I wish I could feel okay making a mistake but I just end up feeling like a bad person”